God has blessed our lives richly through the years. Below is an index with links provided for the following details:
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Our Wedding Day |
Our Wedding
Ironically we were married in the same small country church in Scarboro, Illinois where our lives crossed as kids. |
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Proud Parents with baby Emily |
The Birth of Emily
This was the most significant event since our marriage. |
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Wheelchair Sweethearts -
David broke his leg. |
Setbacks
Setbacks are a part of life. |
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Zany Family at Marine World |
The Good Life
We had some of our best memories when the kids were between 4 and 12 years old. |
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Family Tradition: a Christmas Photo
Number 23 of 26 |
The Later Years
Seeing our kids grow up is a mixed blessing. The struggle is worth it. |
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David and Judy's Early Years
Judy's short story about our first meeting with God's surprising twist:
A Change of Heart*
Two hundred eyes watched the dark oak swinging doors soon to open. "Here Comes the Bride" was surely the next number in the humble piano's prenuptial medley in this little country church in America's heartland of rural Illinois.
Pestering the eager expectancy, like the summer fly that whizzed from pew to pew, was a latecomer. Definitely not the bride. Trying to look inconspicuous, in hustled, the preacher's daughter. Aided by metal-stilt braces, to give height to her midget-size stature, the seven year old stood tall, sort of. But the entire church knew the unhideable truth. Under the pink dotted swiss dress were malformed legs and feet with five toes instead of ten and inside the white cotton gloves were eight fingers.
"She was born that way," is what they said.
Yet, as always, JudyAnn's confident countenance, belying her buck teeth, begot a sanctuary full of honest-to-God smiles. Bittersweet smiles. Twas the freckled-faced boy with aquamarine eyes who, with the voice of silence, thought the truth that no one dared to utter:
"Pity the man who marries her."
"God Bless the Bride. God Bless the Groom," chimed the bell from high up in the white clapboard belfry that joyfilled day in June, 1952.
Many a bride came and many a bride went through that vintage oak frame doorway during the lifetime of the little white country church. But the bells pealed their loudest and proudest in June, 1968, as folks from as far east as New York and as far west as California gathered to witness the wedding of the preacher's daughter.
Standing tall in her "they look so real" artificial limbs, she resembled a princess bride in her white dotted swiss gown with its six- foot-long train. Radiating from behind the European lace veil was her perfect smile. Teardrops of wonder dampened cheeks, and souls clapped their hands as two hundred eyes followed the bride, step by step, down the starched ivory wedding carpet. With one pearl-sequined glove secure on her preacher-father's strong arm, Judy Ann leaned her other hand on her daisy-decked cane. Arm in arm, father and daughter threw invisible kisses to a thankful mother in the front pew.
As the "Wedding March" ended, two hundred eyes contemplated the venerable groom, now a grown lad whose freckles were no more. But his aquamarine eyes were riveted on his bride and his heart, with a change of tune, subvocally sang this new song:
"There are many fine women in this world but you,
my love, are the best of all."
*A slightly modified version of Judy's story was recently published in the book A Cup of Comfort for Weddings - Something old, Something new under the title "The Best of All". See other books in the "Cup of Comfort" Series |
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Our Wedding
David and Judy were married in the same small country church where David remembers Judy's obtrusive entrance seventeen years earlier. Judy's father, Rev. Rieder and her Grandpa, Bishop Epp officiated. David's sister, Linda, played some of the organ music.
June 8, 1968 was a hot day, in fact so hot that Judy's Mom's dress stuck to the moist varnish on the pew. The women of the church prepared a five star reception which was enjoyed before the bride and groom were whisked off in Jerry Urbik's Lincoln Continental to O'hare Airport for a red eye flight to California. Unfortunately a JUST MARRIED sign blocked the air flow to the radiator causing the car to overheat. Stopped alongside the road waiting for assistance, everyone grew anxious fearing the newlyweds might miss their plane. David, the groom, took action, running for water in a pond nearby. The wedding day ended in the San Francisco Bay Area, which would be the newlywed's home for the next 38 years.
Song of Solomon 8:14 "Joyfully the radiant bride turned to him, the one altogether lovely, the chief among 10,000 to her soul, and with unconcealed eagerness to begin her life of sweet companionship with him, she answered: "Make haste, my beloved, and come quickly like a gazelle or a young hart and take me to our waiting home upon the mountain of spices (in Mountain View, California)." -The Amplified Bible
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Our First 10 Years Without Kids
Life was good for Mr. and Mrs. Squier, who focused on their careers during the week and their hobbies, church and travel during the weekends.
David would spend his entire career at Lockheed Martin. Judy worked as a speech pathologist, first at the Stanford Hospital Speech and Hearing Clinic, then at the Crippled Children's Society, but retired when the children arrived.
The Squiers loved to travel. Of course there were many holidays spent back in Illinois with both sets of parents. Weekend trips included exploring world-famous San Francisco, the California Gold Country, Yosemite National Park, and anniversary trips to the East Coast for our fifth anniversary, then Europe for our tenth anniversary.
Both David and Judy were content without children but God had another plan in His Mind.
Jeremiah 29:11 "I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord, "plans for good and not for evil to give you a future and a hope."
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The Birth of Emily
Judy's short story of the miracles associated with motherhood.
"There are two things in life I never want to do: have a root canal or have a baby." My famous words became a mantra. I'd heard horror stories about root canals and I believed my fears of childbearing and childrearing to be well founded. My mother gave birth to me following a difficult pregnancy. I arrived with a webbed hand and two undeveloped legs with no thighs, no knees and a total of five toes, instead of ten. My sister's baby arrived with congenital cataracts.
My husband and I received genetic counseling three years into our marriage and were told our offspring had a 50 % chance of inheriting my disability. In my wheelchair or wearing my artificial limbs, I doubted I could perform the many physical tasks of motherhood. Plus I was scared to death of delivery and childbirth. All this confirmed that having a baby was something I never wanted to do.
God obviously wasn't persuaded by all of my seemingly good arguments and He began to unveil His Plan ten years into my marriage:
During a heart to heart talk with my sister, our conversation turned to the subject of children. "Maybe so" I heard myself say out loud. In talking it over for the hundredth time with my husband, David, we exchanged simultaneous 'pro-family' thoughts for the first time ever.
My two close friends were new mothers. Each had a good pregnancy and delivery, culminating in a healthy baby. One of them, my special God-given friend, Marilee, had been preaching to me for three years: "Judy, you would be a great mother." Unbeknownst to me, I was catching her vision.
Still another factor: a second genetic study refuted the previous opinion. The new geneticist indicated only a 0.5% chance my baby would inherit my birth defect.
With these behind-the-scene developments, David and I, with two changed hearts, made a choice to move in the direction of a family. Ten years on the birth control pill plus our ages (both of us were near thirty-five) caused us some concern. But this did not lessen our God-given enthusiasm and newborn desire to have children.
Feeling somewhat nauseated New Year's morning, I managed to attend church, jotting down a new mantra that would carry me through the next year: "Am I hanging on to something old at the expense of taking hold of something new in Christ?".
The thrill of learning that the New Year's nausea was morning sickness and indeed, I was pregnant was coupled with fear: would motherhood be as fulfilling as my career in speech pathology? Was I willing to be bedridden for three-fourths of a year, if necessary? Who was I kidding, of course I couldn't survive the pain of childbirth. Far from a woman-of-faith at the onset. But our God delights in honesty. Given a heart that is willing, there is no limit to His outpouring of miracles:
The thrill of learning that the New Year's nausea was morning sickness and indeed, I was pregnant was coupled with fear: would motherhood be as fulfilling as my career in speech pathology? Was I willing to be bedridden for three-fourths of a year, if necessary? Who was I kidding, of course I couldn't survive the pain of childbirth. Far from a woman-of-faith at the onset. But our God delights in honesty. Given a heart that is willing, there is no limit to His outpouring of miracles:
· My pregnancy was without complication. I felt like I was at the prime of my life and David said I never looked better. My major complaints were an insatiable craving for McDonald's hamburgers, then tacos, then ice cream and finally Clausen's Dill pickles. It was overdosing on the last two that brought on some gall bladder problems.
· My weight gain totaled twelve pounds, not enough to throw off my balance wearing my artificial limbs nor to prevent me from wearing them. I was on my feet, and in fact in the office the day before delivery.
· Gradually my fear of giving up a career I was good at and entering the unknown was countered with a growing confidence that God was trustworthy. Indeed He was asking me to let go of an old life that I knew was good, so I could enter a new life that would be His Best,
· And finally, the labor and delivery, 'my dread for decades' came and went so fast I nearly missed it. Following three hours of labor at home, ten minutes in the ambulance and three minutes in the Emergency Room, Emily Beth entered time, all five pounds, six ounces of her. Her father didn't recognize her gender until he had carefully scrutinized her whole body with ten fingers, long legs, knees, feet and ten toes. Thank You, Lord.
She arrived on August 14th,. Soon after God unveiled the triple uniqueness of that date:
On August 14, fourteen years earlier, thanks to my Aunt Ginny, I experienced a new birth and received Jesus Christ;
On August 14, one year earlier, dining at Emlee's Restaurant in Carmel, California David and I determined should God give us a baby girl, we would call her Emily.
And on this August 14, our Heavenly Father God gave us Emily, a cooing and kicking memorial stone reminding us that His Specialty is to walk us head on into our fears, teaching us there is nothing to fear.
And how special to discover the name Emily means 'diligent one' for we are expecting that God built into her special abilities to be 'mama's helper' should God bless the Squier Family with additional memorial stones.
Postscript: Emily was joined by two sisters, Elizabeth and Naphtalie Joy. The uniqueness of God's gift to their mom, was stated well when a friend said: "Judy, how good God is- you were born with no legs and now you have six good legs."
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Then Betsy, Then Naphtalie
Judy's short story of how God shows up for the rescue.
Heaven's Best Helper
Most of our friends said, "Don't do it". In fact, I can remember mom telling me as I grew up: "Don't ever have kids." So my husband, David, and I waited for 9 years before considering a family. It wasn't just the usual concerns. Genetic counseling indicated we had a fifty percent chance our children would be born without legs, just like their mom.
Our first child almost arrived at home, though thanks to the paramedics she arrived ten minutes after I was whisked into the Emergency Room at Stanford Hospital. Her father carefully noted she had legs, feet and ten toes, before rejoicing that our baby was a little girl. We named her Emily.
Mothering our firstborn was the usual adventure PLUS. With trial and error I learned what jobs worked best from my wheelchair and which ones worked better with my artificial limbs on. Intuitively, our baby adapted to me - she'd tuck her chin into my shoulder to steady herself when I'd carry her while walking. As she grew, she became the Mama's Best Helper, picking up items I'd dropped, getting things from the other room.
The day I realized that Emily and I could manage mothering is the day I wanted more children. Next came Elizabeth.
It was one of those days I was sure I'd bit off more than I could chew. The girls and I headed out the door for a 10:30 AM doctor's appointment. I was four months pregnant with our third child. Slowly, tiredly I loaded my wheelchair into our van, got the two girls in their car seats and we were off. Disappointed to see the handicapped parking spots full up by the hospital entrance, I parked down the hill. I sat for a spell, too fatigued to begin the unloading ritual. When I looked at the sidewalk in front of the car, I saw a not much to look at man, whose eyes met mine. With a smile, he walked over to my door and said: "What do I do to help?"
I talked him through the unloading routine: he got out my wheelchair, helped me into it, assisted the girls out, helped Elizabeth unto my lap: "Oops, don't squeeze baby," I warned her as she leaned back. Emily held on to the armrest alongside my chair and the stranger stood behind, guiding us all up the incline.
We were a great team. Entering into the hospital, he pushed; I helped steer us to the elevator. He pressed the button. Then I turned to thank him. No one was there.
We proceeded to the OB appointment, stopped at the grocery store. I cooked and served dinner, cleaned up the kitchen, put Elizabeth to bed. As I relaxed in the rocker reading Emily some goodnight stories, it suddenly hit me. My words confirmed for both of us, what had been a silent hunch:
"You met an angel today, Emily."
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Setbacks
Surely there were parenting days when the angels showed up --God-to-the-rescue- but the reality is there were those days when we wondered about God's plan for good for our lives.
Like the summer when Emily was just two years old and I was 8 months pregnant with daughter number two. As we left our much-loved library, Emily walked close beside me. My right hand leaned on my cane and my left held a bag overflowing with 13 library books. Out of the blue, I crashed to the ground. My artificial limb had broken at the ankle. My foot lay in an irregular position close by. I couldn't move. Little Em began to scream hysterically, drawing a man in the library to our aid. He lifted me into the driver's seat of our van and Em into her car seat. Off we went to the legman in San Francisco where my limb was refiberglassed and fixed in a flash but it took Emily one month before she wanted to come near her mama. Those were lonely days.
Legs, legs, legs. Ironically there's more fuss than the average about legs: my legs not developing in utero; seven sets of artificial limbs in the course of my lifetime; our family song going something like -"May I borrow your legs, I have need of them, mine don't work so well..." Then there was David's knee infection shortly before our 20th anniversary landing him in a wheelchair, meaning we both used chairs on a Carribean cruise.
But David's biggest setback came in 1990 when he fell from 12 feet up a ladder onto our asphalt driveway. No, not just a broken leg. Actually his ankle (lower tibia) shattered into 70 pieces. "You have to save my leg", he told the emergency room nurse, "my wife doesn't have any." She thought his compound fracture was making him delirious. Three operations followed within the week. Poor Papa. The girls were ages 6, 9 and 11. We were also beginning a mega-remodel, the transmission went out on our car while David was in the hospital and Judy was beginning the ominous assignment as the elementary school's PTA co-presidency.
Bob Bonner once said "When we live in our sufficiency, we MISS who God is." That was the autumn we met El Shaddai - the All-Sufficient-God. Stripped of our sufficiency, we relied on His and found Him so dependable that David and I agreed that the name El Shaddai, not The Squiers earned the place of honor above the front door of our home. And that was the year Emily chose Michael Card's song El Shaddai for her piano recital. Mom's favorite line was "Your (God's) most awesome work was done through the frailty of Your Son."
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The Good Life
Our bookcase at Sheep's Rest contains 75 scrapbooks chronicling the Squier Family story. Memories of the Good Life God gave us. The best years, unanimously, were when the girls were little, preadolescence. Suddenly we had ballerinas, soccer and basketball players, skiers, gymnasts, Brownies, musicians, artists - all under one roof. Papa's thing was to load us in the family van for loooong drives to Illinois via the national parks. Amidst the glory of seeing America, were moans and squabbles but now we all remember the good old days. Mom's surprise was being chosen with two other Americans dealing with disability to receive the Anschutz Award in 1991 in Washington D.C. from Focus on the Family and Family Research Council. The entire family enjoyed an all-expenses-paid vacation and then some.
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The Later Years
Judy has been known to say, God makes us parents so that we can learn to depend on a Heavenly Father. Indeed we have so little control over life. And children accentuate the truth of our powerlessness and drive home the reality that we need help from a Higher Power, which for our family meant El Elyon, the Most High God. Judy wrote the following free verse when the hormones were raging with three teenagers and their mom in menopause. Poor David! But God's Masterpiece is redemption - with Him nothing is wasted.
God's Masterpiece: The Family
By: Judy Squier
Papa's hard of hearing, Mama's got no legs,
Betsy's got a temper, Emily can hit the dregs.
Naphy's known to tattle, Spot's beat up by Buck.
Fritz whines and shivers. Herein: our family's muck.
David's got a heart of gold,
Judy's got ideas untold.
Emily seeks the peace to make,
Betsy's our family's fashion plate.
Naphy's got the gift of helps.
Three dogs deliver licks in yelps.
A family is a blend we see,
There's bad in you and bad in me.
The gold and good are also there,
But not as obvious, oft unaware.
We fight. We yell.
It feels like hell.
We crack. We break.
We cry. We ache.
"Behold, My Masterpiece", God says from above,
"I'll save your family, I'll teach you to love.
Selfishness, rudeness, unkindness, all three
They're tools in My Hands to drive you to Me."
So I, a mom, in the midst of this all,
Wholeheartedly pray for God's overhaul.
I confess my contribution to our endless, ugly strife.
I teach Your Way with my words, but resist Your Will with my life.
Desperate, yet believing, I know God is able,
His Peace, His beauty, this vicious cycle to disable.
And our family one day will thankfully display
"His Redeemed" as our label God's work underway.
The goal to believe I know I can do.
"To God Be All Glory," I'll declare when we're through.
And thanks to the pain, Agape we'll discover
As we behold Christ's image miraculously formed in each other.
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